Helping Strangers

     This past Sunday our Pastor was speaking about hearing God, and how we need to train ourselves to listen for his voice. It was this sermon that made me remember a time when I heard God’s voice speaking directly to me. I’d like to share this with you, and know that God is looking to communicate with you if you’re willing to listen.

     It was around 9 years ago I was working in a fast food restaurant as a manager, I had just gotten off of my evening shift (2pm – 12pm) and was on my way home. This is when I was enjoying some country music on the radio enjoying my trip home, I remember vividly, I had became overwhelmed with emotions and I heard the following “Give Laura $200.” and that was all I heard. There was no why, no when, and no clear explanation for this.

     I fully believed in God and was actively worshiping, I had only my paycheck of $485, this was to cover gas, rent, groceries. I didn’t even want to spare any money to anyone. But I didn’t want to question God, who does that…? Oh yeah wait I did. I asked him in prayer if he really wanted me to do this, I told him I couldn’t spare anything, and I was just short of saying “No, God I really don’t want to do this.”. 

     Well the next day I was at the gas station getting fuel and a drink for my trip to work, I seen the ATM but I just didn’t go and withdraw the money to give to Laura. I finished fueling my car and departed the gas station to head to work. Well an hour later I arrived to work and walked into the building, looked over at the ATM and walked over withdrawing $200.

     During my shift I called the young lady into the Manager’s Office, I told her I don’t know if you believe in God but he hears your cries for help. Last night he asked me to give you exactly $200, and I simply handed her the money. Well she actually teared up and confessed that she did believe in God and was in need of help. I asked her if it wasn’t an issue if she could tell me what she needed money for, well she looked at me and said “I’m short $200 on my rent this month and I just don’t know what else to say.”

     I told her that she only had to thank God and that I was simply following orders from him. I don’t know what this was all about, was God testing me, would I serve his will no matter what he asked of me? I didn’t suffer that month either, I had just enough money for my bills and that just meant less play money.

 So now I say, Lord please continue to use me, talk to me, and let me help others that pray to you for assistance. This is my will, and what I want to do. Now I’m at a point in my life when I could really use that $200, The Lord has actually blessed me with more than that and for that I’m thankful I didn’t question Him, but just followed in obedience to Him.

     Just last month during all of my struggles I was blessed with money that helped my family temporarily, and I continue to pray to God for the long term help we need.


Trials and Tribulations

     This time last month I received news that my Social Security Disability Claim had been denied again, I was crumbling in spiritual faith. Why would God not grant me something that I desperately needed in my life, did God even exist, so many questions filled my head. A good friend of mine whom is also a Pastor received my text message about my questions. He immediately responded and it was in that phone call I was awakened and realized it wasn’t God’s fault at all, it was my fault. Talk about putting pride aside and realizing when you are actually wrong about something.

Just when I feel peace in my life and that everything is heading into a positive direction, again we are forced with a life altering event. We are to relocate by July 1st because my brothers landlord found out we had been seeking shelter in his basement. Last month I would have been devastated by such news, and it is because I had righted my heart and reached out to God, heard his answers, and began to lead my family into the spiritual light, that today I am not afraid.

(Mat 24:21 KJV) For then shall be great tribulation, such as was not since the beginning of the world to this time, no, nor ever shall be.

 While the above verse is actually speaking of war, this here relates to the my situation because to me I’m at war. War with The Devil, he’s lurking about and trying to stir up chaos as I’m building a spiritual foundation for my family. It’s also interesting to note that the Websters Bible Dictionary States:

TRIBULA’TION, n. [L. tribulo, to thrash, to beat.] Severe affliction; distresses of life; vexations. In Scripture, it often denotes the troubles and distresses which proceed from persecution.

     So yes this is a tribulation, while there is no lynch mob gunning for my family, we are still in a spiritual war. This time however I’ve got ammunition (God’s Word) to battle back with, and I’m much strong than I was one month ago.

     To the person whom for lack of words ratted this information out to bring harm towards us, I forgive you. I hold no anger in my heart towards you, and this is just a door that God will close to open a new one for my family.

(Eph 4:31 KJV) Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice:

(Eph 4:32 KJV) And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you.

 Last month I would have probably acted out in anger and could have made the situation a whole lot uglier. Grace be to God for opening my heart and allowing me to forgive, for opening my eyes to allow me to see our adversary (The Devil) lurking around, and for the strength I need to face this tribulation.

Once Upon A Time

I remember once upon a time when I was a child I would have terrible boxing matches with the air, but my vivid nightmares had me wondering what I was actually fighting. Afraid to fall asleep most times because of this I finally had a weapon that I could use.

You are of God, little children, and have overcome them, because He who is in you is greater than he who is in the world. (I John 4:4 NKJV)

I would say this to myself when I was scared, when I was feeling lonely, and when I needed my fathers comfort. I remember the courage it gave me as a child and I know it still stands true even today, basements still creep me out, and I still use this in situations that creep me out. It’s just a wonderful feeling of calmness and peace that this single verse gives me that I felt it was worthy to mention on my blog.

Wake Up!

Over the course of a month or so, I’ve set out on a new life so to speak, a journey that will lead me to an understanding of God. This was a way of life I once knew and lived, but seemed to have forgotten in my own cloud of confusion and unsatisfactory with what I thought God should have been doing in my life.

Today I was reading the book of Romans following a study plan, I stumbled onto:
(Rom 15:4 MKJV) For whatever things were written before were written for our learning, so that we through patience and comfort of the Scriptures might have hope.

It occurred to me, I’m learning now so I can have hope, and yet it is hope I already had. So I never lost hope, I just lost my way which in turn took my hope away.

A Simple Cure, Why God?

The loss of our grandson Zaidyn has and will always sadden our hearts, bring us memories of joy, and cause us to question the very faith that we’ve followed most of our lives. As many of us prayed for the healing and curing of Zaidyn, we also all sat and watched as he would go from stable to worse, back to stable, and back to worse. We are faced with a choice, do we continue to hold true to our faith in God, or do we simply walk away from the only thing that has ever given us hope? I’ll answer this shortly.

We’ve asked ourselves time and time again, where was God when we needed him, and why didn’t he cure this child whom did no wrong? The answers have always been here for us, we were just too blinded by grief to look for them, and in some cases to accept them. We know that Jesus has countless accounts of healing various diseases and sicknesses, look at the accounts in [Matthew 9:35-36], not only did he also talk about the resurrection of the Daughter of Jairus [Mark 5:21-43] in a few versus up but he healed every sickness and every disease among the people.

Look also at [Matthew 9:28], Jesus asks the blind men, “Believe ye that I am able to do this?” Did we all believe that the Lord our God could do this for Zaidyn? Yes, but did we believe 100% I cannot attest to that with certainty. I myself was flawed in my own faith, only turning to God in moments like the one mentioned and turning away when everything was going well. Sure, I knew I could pray and that God would answer and I knew he could do it; I just questioned why he didn’t do it.

I started answering my first question above, my faith was wrong; my heart was not as it should’ve been. I know now that Zaidyn had a purpose here, that purpose may not be for me to know, but I do know it exists. I don’t blame God for what happened to Zaidyn because had he been here he would have certainly seen the grief and torture this it was causing in his mother’s heart and awakened him, just as he did when he raised The Young Man from Nain [Luke 7:11-17].  But we will have to wait for His return in order to be reunited again with our grandson.

I choose to believe, I want my faith to be stronger, and I know that by righting my heart and life that I will be blessed by God. My heart is at ease, my study today lasted for a few hours because I wanted God to take me by the hand and open up his word to me, he did.