Category Archives: Christianity


Typically today I would be posting a Sermon with plenty of fact filled biblical truths, but today I wanted to create a different type of Sermon, one that would reveal some updated information about my family and our struggles, and show you how we also walk in faith to keep our spirits lifted.

I’ve gone as far as I’m willing to go, and I see no end in sight.

We’ve all had something in our lives which has caused us to undergo some form of hurt, change, struggle, and this list is endless. For myself and my family we struggle financially, we don’t have a turkey set aside for Thanksgiving, and we are most likely going to have spaghetti for our festive dinner this year, and that’s without any meat in the sauce. How awful that sounds, and the typical answer we receive is in the form of “What about family?”. If you’ve kept up with my blog you’ll discover we had to move to North Carolina in order to have shelter, as we couldn’t afford to remain in Maryland with our family close by. Travel isn’t an option as we are trying to save up all we can to make a trip for Christmas this year.

don’t know if can take anymore of this.

I set the stage just there, your now on the same page as me. While our human emotions would love to keep us depressed and how Satan would love to keep us dwelling on the negative things in life, it is by faith we walk and live, and because of that Satan is kicked to the curb. I’ve been a Pastor in my house, during the week I study the Bible and God moves me into the direction He wants me to go in, and I without question eagerly follow and accept all He asks of me. We have been looking for a new Church in our new area in order to worship, grow spiritually, and to seek help from fellow Christians.

During my last doctor appointment I had observed a Holy Bible that looked old and rustic sitting on the table with a few other magazines nearby, this Bible looked like it had survived World War I, and it really made me feel blessed. I’m a self pay patient, I can’t afford insurance and I can barely afford to attend but medically I need to. I was walked back and weighted then taken into the room to await the doctor, but I had to ask the lady taking my vitals about the Holy Bible on the table out front. She explained how it’s always been there and didn’t seem to understand why I was so excited to see it and I had to tell her I felt it was such a blessing to see it out in the open, and not thrown out of the building!

The doctor walked into the room and she was eager to see how my blood pressure was doing, it was great and the medications were working. She asked me how my son was doing, which I was surprised by, and that opened up for further conversation about family and how we are struggling to make it. She told me we should try her church out, and it was at this moment when I felt God was working with her to point us into a new direction. After this visit I went to see how much the damage was, and the young lady said she would have to check and see how much the charge would be for today, when she got back she was smiling ear to ear and told me the amount.  Needless to say I had paid a fraction of my last visit which I still owed money for, and I felt truly blessed and for once I felt that someone outside of my family believed me and knew my struggle was real.  Lastly I’m diabetic and I haven’t had a meter or test strips, the doctor was able to get me a meter and got me 20 test strips so I could check my sugar at least once a week for now, I was just overcome with joy by that kind gesture.

You are not alone, I am here to help you. Look to me for your strength and I will never fail you.

It was clear to me that I needed to get us to this new church on Sunday,  and it was such a joyful visit. We had such a great time worshiping, listening to the message, and my son Alex had a blast in his play room. It was nearly identical to the church we loved back home, and I can see us returning. God used an individual to communicate a message to me, and we obeyed Him without question. While we still have our day to day issues and we are in need of help, we are overcome by the power of worship and Satan still remains sitting on the curb.

So while I may not have the traditional Thanksgiving dinner, my past due bills remain past due, and the systems that are in place to help families seem to fail when you actually need the help. I will not doubt my God’s ability to get us through this hard time, I will trust Him fully knowing that His plan is the best plan for us. This is the faith I have in God, I fully trust and know that He has a plan that will remove any permanent suffering from us, and deliver us from these short term struggles.

prayed and He heard my heart full of thanks towards Him, and asked for nothing because I knew He has already planned to give me what I NEED.

My dream was clear, when Peter stepped onto the surface of the water and fully trusted in Jesus and took that first step, he was starting to walk in faith. When the wind blew and the sea roared he lost his faith and failed to remain on the surface with his feet and called out for help, Jesus helped him. At times we will walk on the surface of the water and forget about why we have faith, it’s in the troubling times where we see no end in sight that we need to remain walking on the surface of the water, and in doing so we walk by faith. Place the full armor of God on you and know that with Him you are never alone, and you cannot be stopped.

We are thankful for what He has given us and has continued to do for us, and the food that he has blessed us with. So in closing we don’t need a traditional meal to show we are thankful, we will cook what we are able and we will pray in thanks for having the food we do have to consume. Faith keeps us strong, and we are thankful for the small things that occur in our lives that fortify our faith. If you haven’t found the gift of Jesus in your life, I urge you to listen out for the person that will direct you to a church and go check it out. I’ve had friends and others tell us to go to this church or that church, but when I heard it from a doctor I know nothing about it really caught me by surprise and I couldn’t ignore it.


Once Upon A Time

I remember once upon a time when I was a child I would have terrible boxing matches with the air, but my vivid nightmares had me wondering what I was actually fighting. Afraid to fall asleep most times because of this I finally had a weapon that I could use.

You are of God, little children, and have overcome them, because He who is in you is greater than he who is in the world. (I John 4:4 NKJV)

I would say this to myself when I was scared, when I was feeling lonely, and when I needed my fathers comfort. I remember the courage it gave me as a child and I know it still stands true even today, basements still creep me out, and I still use this in situations that creep me out. It’s just a wonderful feeling of calmness and peace that this single verse gives me that I felt it was worthy to mention on my blog.

Wake Up!

Over the course of a month or so, I’ve set out on a new life so to speak, a journey that will lead me to an understanding of God. This was a way of life I once knew and lived, but seemed to have forgotten in my own cloud of confusion and unsatisfactory with what I thought God should have been doing in my life.

Today I was reading the book of Romans following a study plan, I stumbled onto:
(Rom 15:4 MKJV) For whatever things were written before were written for our learning, so that we through patience and comfort of the Scriptures might have hope.

It occurred to me, I’m learning now so I can have hope, and yet it is hope I already had. So I never lost hope, I just lost my way which in turn took my hope away.

A Simple Cure, Why God?

The loss of our grandson Zaidyn has and will always sadden our hearts, bring us memories of joy, and cause us to question the very faith that we’ve followed most of our lives. As many of us prayed for the healing and curing of Zaidyn, we also all sat and watched as he would go from stable to worse, back to stable, and back to worse. We are faced with a choice, do we continue to hold true to our faith in God, or do we simply walk away from the only thing that has ever given us hope? I’ll answer this shortly.

We’ve asked ourselves time and time again, where was God when we needed him, and why didn’t he cure this child whom did no wrong? The answers have always been here for us, we were just too blinded by grief to look for them, and in some cases to accept them. We know that Jesus has countless accounts of healing various diseases and sicknesses, look at the accounts in [Matthew 9:35-36], not only did he also talk about the resurrection of the Daughter of Jairus [Mark 5:21-43] in a few versus up but he healed every sickness and every disease among the people.

Look also at [Matthew 9:28], Jesus asks the blind men, “Believe ye that I am able to do this?” Did we all believe that the Lord our God could do this for Zaidyn? Yes, but did we believe 100% I cannot attest to that with certainty. I myself was flawed in my own faith, only turning to God in moments like the one mentioned and turning away when everything was going well. Sure, I knew I could pray and that God would answer and I knew he could do it; I just questioned why he didn’t do it.

I started answering my first question above, my faith was wrong; my heart was not as it should’ve been. I know now that Zaidyn had a purpose here, that purpose may not be for me to know, but I do know it exists. I don’t blame God for what happened to Zaidyn because had he been here he would have certainly seen the grief and torture this it was causing in his mother’s heart and awakened him, just as he did when he raised The Young Man from Nain [Luke 7:11-17].  But we will have to wait for His return in order to be reunited again with our grandson.

I choose to believe, I want my faith to be stronger, and I know that by righting my heart and life that I will be blessed by God. My heart is at ease, my study today lasted for a few hours because I wanted God to take me by the hand and open up his word to me, he did.